What Would Mrs. D Say?

Dear Mrs. D:

I have a great guilt thinking that my 13-year-old daughter is a bitch.  Are these thoughts normal?  She is always right, always stirring trouble with the younger kids, expects me to drop everything for her, and refuses to help with household chores because “she didn’t make the mess”  My only thought that comes to mind is…what a bitch! -someone save ME!

 

-Can’t Stand My Teenager
Dear Can’t Stand My Teenager,
Rest easy Mama!  I think this is a normal phase for both a daughter and her mother!
Teenager ecard
My pediatrician calls this type of child strong-willed, independent and a leader (wink-wink).  Although she sounds tough to deal with right now; she already has some of the best survival tools for life.  Maybe she is suffering from “teenager-itis”.  (This is a word that I may have made up but I feel like I have heard it before.)  Anyway, it’s when teenagers are stuck in that awkward middle ground.  They become jealous of the younger kids and are too young to be called a grown-up.  Perhaps a little date will cure all of your problems and reset her brain to the sweet little girl she once was.  Take her on a daughter/mommy date and do something special together.  Let me know if it works.  If it doesn’t, I will hide under my desk.
-Mrs. D
Dear Mrs. D:
I am forced to listen to a fellow new mom whining because her 4 month old has been up once in the middle of the night for THREE WHOLE NIGHTS in a row?  My thoughts … I just want to scream — my almost 4 month old has been up once in the middle of the night since birth with no sign of that changing – am I tired? yes – do I whine about it? – no … so please shut the F-up and stop complaining!

-New and Annoyed

 

Dear New and Annoyed:

People who complain about something that seems manageable to the rest of the world ARE annoying but try not to let them get under your skin.  Chances are high that the same mom who has a good sleeper  struggles with something else.  The grass is really never greener, trust me.

-Mrs. D

 

Dear Mrs. D:

People that constantly comment on the size my child annoy me.  He is tall.  We are aware.  His/her statement of this fact is by no way bringing it to my attention for the first time.  What the hell do they want me to do?  Startle and say “my god he is tall – thank you, thank you for pointing that out to me”?

-Mother of the Tall One

 

Dear Mother of the Tall One:

For some stupid reason people feel they need to state the obvious.  It starts with pregnancy and never really goes away.  I think you should come up with a funny reply like “Yeah…he’s a big boy. You should see the size of his penis?”  Ha ha ha!  That will get rid of ’em.

-Mrs. D

 

Do you have a parenting question for Mrs. D?

Please write.  mrsdohertyunleashed@gmail.com

DISCLAIMER: Any and all answers are completely unprofessional and should not be taken seriously.  Don’t be an idiot.  If you have real issues, seek a real professional, not me.  Any question sent via email can be used on my website and/or social media.  Authors will remain anonymous. You suck.  Just kidding. I was making sure you were reading this very important message.  Don’t sue me. I hate that.  It ruins all the fun and then you really would suck.  My advice is random and solely depends on the amount of sleep I got last night.  Sad but true.  Peace out bitches.